Interrupting my already delayed broadcast of this year’s AX xD to bring you this really sad news:

Hirajima Natsumi 1st generation member of AKB and Yonezawa Rumi 3rd generation member have resigned as of today and won’t be involved in any more AKB related activities.

The reason why they resigned was because they had private locked twitter accounts where they uploaded private pictures including some pics with guys. Rumi also wrote a post about how she was recently single for the first time in 4 years (great job covering it up FWIW) and something about wanting to find a new bf.

See, this is why the “no dating” rule is stupid. I understand (well, not really comprehend, but I try my best) that wotas need to support girls who are pure and virginal and don’t even talk to any other male member of the human species because if it’s any other way it kills their fantasy of their idol being a perfect doll waiting for them or whatever, but uhhh could they get a little in touch with reality?

That was harsh, yes, but I can’t word it any other way :s I don’t mean to be insulting, because all of us have a different reason why we are into idols, and that’s respectable, but I can’t believe that at this point in life, with all the evidence that many idols date while they are doing the job (Oshima Mai, Ono Erena, Fujimoto Miki, Kago Ai, Tsuji Nozomi, Yaguchi Mari, Matsuura Aya etc.) they still think that the girl they are fans of is a *special snowflake* who goes home every night to comb her hair and put on her cozy pjs and fall asleep with her mom stroking her hair.

If we go by statistics there must be girls who fit this bill, but the majority of them are probably in between, who knows? My point is, nobody should butt in their personal life and try to dig their past or their private affairs. It’s disgusting.

I assume that most idol fans are familiar with the concept that most of what we see is an elaborate illusion, and that the girls behind the idol mask can sometimes be different from the persona they assume on stage, hell, they aren’t even marketed as girls per se but as idols with their distinct stage name and whatever; some of them even have a different name in real life! I don’t think that all of them are ultra happy 100% of the time in their private lives or that they are super excited to meet some pervert at a handshake event who makes disgusting sexual comments at them like what happened with Chiyuu (nor do I think that in their private lives they would react with a polite smile to all the rude people who shake hands with them or hell, even be willing to shake hands with random strangers at all!) but all of these things come with the job description.

However, and I feel really strongly about this, I think that once they are out of the spotlight, they aren’t the “Idol Product” anymore. Once she leaves the theater Nacchi becomes Sato Natsuki, Acchan becomes Maeda Atsuko and so on, and we may never know how big the gap between the two is, because if they are good at their job they will charm us with their charisma and make us fall in love with an image, a fake perception.

I think that just like giggling stupidly whenever someone talks about love comes with the territory and they are supposed to save face in their job and pretend that they don’t care about boys at all and that they have never kissed anyone even though they are 25 what they do in their free time is nobody’s business and wotas should back the fuck off, seriously.

I understand that there’s a rule in their contract against dating, but do you people really think that out of 200+ teenager girls none of them is dating anyone or fooling around or whatever? You’d have to be very naive to think otherwise, especially because when you’re young hormones are running rampant and you won’t be able to make cold headed choices in the face of “temptation”.

I wish Nacchan and Yonechan the best, they were both greatly underappreciated which probably prompted their quick dismissal without much fuss. I hope that both of them can go on to have fantastic fulfilling jobs and lives and that they don’t regret what they did in the future.

Kudos to Akimoto for saying that AKB is not the be all end all of showbusiness and that they can still have a great career despite of this circumstances. I think he knows much more than he lets on, especially if you analyze some of the lyrics he has written before (particularly Renai Kinshi Jourei and Idol Nante Yobanaide)

I know that the rule will probably keep existing for as long as idols do, but I can’t with this anymore, especially because regardless of how you want to spin it I can’t help but see it as sexism (especially because of how differently male idols are treated…) and I can’t deal with any more of that shit right now after the (female) doctor who is in charge of picking people for the residency I want to apply to said that she hates women because they are catty and problematic and they can’t carry the chairs around (wtf even) so she tries to never select women from all the candidates that apply. I hate the world sometimes.

EDIT: And lol @ the people saying “You are just UNEDUCATED and don’t understand japanese culture and that’s why you think this rule is bad”

I mean, really? You think slut shaming is an educated position? Oh god.

And also, there’s a huge difference between understanding why something exists and agreeing with it existing. I know full well the implications of the rule, and I also know that it will never stop existing as long as wotas still exist, doesn’t mean that I will stop thinking that it’s useless and stupid and that it’s honestly problematic that people can’t function correctly in society and have to cling to this super high expectations of purity for girls they will never even really meet in real life, and if they do they don’t  stand a chance with them anyway (I’m talking about the extreme wota here, not the casual fans).

Blergh this topic makes me rage.

Hi everyone! happy new year! Sorry about the lack of posts but uhh my waning interest in AKB and my hectic real life have been a bad combination this holiday. However, one of those things has changed now with this event!

AKB is funny. When I actively try to find reasons to like them again they go and release Ue Kara Mariko, which is their worst single ever (obviously IMO, this is a blog everything is IMO etc.) and I try and order their Seibu Dome concert and the people in my building lose my parcel and all of that just makes me rage.

But when I’m already over them, they go and do something amazing, like this concert and I’m baffled and don’t know what to feel anymore xD I think I’ll just stop trying to analyze things and go with the flow… So here’s the set list and some comments from this year’s Request Hour concert, which in case you don’t know, it’s an event held every year in which fans vote for 100 songs out of AKB’s discography and they get performed during 4 days.

There are several things that made this AX different, the main one being that subunits (Watarirouka, no3b, Not yet etc) weren’t available to be voted for this year, and the other one is that none of the graduated members would be coming back this year Between this and the anniversary show which didn’t have graduated members either I’m pretty sure they won’t be coming back for any AKB stuff anymore, which makes me sad beyond belief. But anyway.

Here’s the set list and pictures thanks to HoneyRoastedPeanuts @Stage48

Day 1

00. Guruguru Curtain (Nogizaka46): lol “rival” group coming through. Honestly, I love this song, it sounds retro and the Nogizaka girls are still unpopular so girls who sing decently are allowed in senbatsu. We’re finally understanding that instead of being “rivals to destroy” it’s like rivals in the sense that they help you improve or whatever, it sounds more aspirational than anything else so it makes a bit more sense

100. Theater no Megami (B5) (AX11 51): This one took quite a dive. The main theme of B5, a very cutesy song. Kinda meh tbh

99. Pajama Drive (B3 Watanabe, Hirajima, Nakagawa): This song didn’t rank last year so I’m incredibly surprised and happy that it managed to climb up again. I guess that with Mayu fans not having Warota solos to vote for they went for her stage units. I really like this song and B3 in general so I’m glad they made it.

98. Dakishimeraretara (K5 Kasai, Kuramochi, Sato): Another one that didn’t rank last year! I love this unit, it sounds so good! And the lyrics of the song are super beautiful as well. Original Team K is the best thing that ever happened to AKB, so I’m incredibly happy to see it well represented in this concert. Chiyuu <3

97. Dear my Teacher (A1) (AX11 86): One of the most iconic AKB songs yet it keeps falling and falling I’m glad that it made it this time anyway, even if just for nostalgia’s sake. Sad that there weren’t graduated members there to perform it but you can’t win ‘em all I guess.

96. Anata ga Ite Kureta Kara (Setlist Greatest Songs Kanzenban album song) (AX11 19): This is a very touching song and the PV with shots of the girls when they were just starting out in AKB was also really nice. To fall from top 20 to 96 is pretty tough but every year there’s so much more competition that just making it in is amazing in itself

95. AKB Sanjou! (A5) (AX11 97): This song managed to go up from last year! It’s one of my favorites, and the theme song of Team A and AKB as a whole for a while during 2009.

94. Higurashi no Koi (H1 Takahashi, Masuda) (AX11 79): I’m glad that this wasn’t performed by Team 4. Listen, I like Team 4 a lot, I think they are amazing, but honestly, this is the only chance we get to watch the original line up do it, while Team 4 do it all the time in the theater. Great song, it’s funny that it’s always hovering in the last spots even though it’s a fan favorite. I hope it keeps ranking.

93. Wasshoi E! (E1): Since people could vote separately for this or the original Wasshoi B! I’m glad that the SKE girls of Team E (who are great) managed to snatch this position! Great reward for their hard work.

92. High School Days (Team 4 and KKs from Koko ni ita koto album): I don’t like this song much, but any Team 4 presence in here is welcome, especially if they’re singing their own songs haha

91. Kataomoi no Taikakusen (B4 Nito, Komori, Yonezawa) (AX11 47): I love Moeno, so I’m glad she managed to earn this position for her unit song.

90. Seifuku Resistance (K5 Itano, Nakatsuka, Yokoyama) (AX11 37): Another huge drop for Tomochin’s unit, but my baby Yui manages to rank here with her unit!!! So proud of her!!!

89. To be Continued (K5): This one didn’t make it last year, but managed to appear this year. The lyrics to this song are so pretty and meaningful, I’m glad people appreciate it even though it comes from a stage. K5 was so underrated because it didn’t sound like typical idol music

88. 16nin Shimai no Uta (K4 Sato, Matsubara, Kobayashi) (AX11 85): Yiiiiihaw! xD I love this song with all my heart. It’s so campy and ridiculous! Introducing all of the Team K members with one of their main personality traits. Priceless! I hope it never stops ranking! Shame that the graduated members couldn’t be there for it

87. Seventeen (Greatest Sogs Kanzenban album) (AX11 66): Cute song! Also the last remainder of their amazing Defstar era.

86. Nakeru Basho (Beginner C/W) (AX11 56): DIVA the B-side sub unit shows up with this beautiful ballad. One of the prettiest songs of recent AKB and definitely one with fantastic vocals.

85. Ice no Kuchizuke (Flying Get C/W Itano, Oshima, Sasaki, Maeda At, Takahashi, Watanabe, Shinoda): This is one of 5 AKB songs I absolutely adored last year so I’m super glad it made it!

84. Hikkoshimashita (K6): More Team K!!! Always a great thing <3 This song is really meaningful to the girls because it’s about someone who moves from their old house and yet promises they’ll never forget their old friends. The girls relate to it because of the shuffle.

83. FIRST LOVE (Namida Surprise C/W Kato Rena) (AX11 16): Wow. I’m shocked that people voted for this even though Togasaki already said beforehand that Ono Erena wouldn’t be coming back to perform it. This is her signature song, so to speak, so it’s shocking that people still went and voted. Maybe they were hoping TGSK was wrong? Maybe they just like the song and it doesn’t matter who sings it? (I’m mainly on that camp, this is one of my favorite AKB songs ever). On the other hand, Kato Rena singing it! She’s a kks who has been heavily pushed lately, performing Nagisa no Cherry in their recent AKB Kouhaku concert and stuff. The thing is, she is the least energetic performer I’ve ever seen so she’s not going to be in my personal top 100 anytime soon I guess she’s being groomed to be the next Team 4 ace, since Minarun failed spectacularly.

82. Iikagen no Susume (Koko ni Ita Koto Akimoto, Katayama, Matsui Rena, Miyazawa, Shinoda): I guess people did like the album after all

81. Kimi ni Tsuite (Beginner C/W Maeda At, Kasai, Katayama, Nito, Matsui Sakiko) (AX11 28): MINT! <3 Their best song and all! Ohhh AKB fans are starting to develop good taste I see (j/k)

80. Blue Rose (K2 Akimoto, Masuda, Yamauchi, Miyazawa) (AX11 90): Blue Rose manages to climb 10 positions! ;_; So happy! This is a fantastic song, so legendary! Kinda sad that Meetan wasn’t there with her gold bikini, but Ranran is super hot and I’m sure she did great!

79. Sougen no Kiseki (K3) (AX11 75): This song is so meaningful and beautiful ;_; I cried like a baby when they sang it in Erena’s graduation ceremony. OMG so so so so happy with all the Ori K love!

78. Nagisa no Cherry (A2 Maeda At, Aigasa, Hasegawa, Murayama) (AX11 52): Surprised that Maeda fans allowed this to drop so much, but I guess they had too many songs to vote for and they spread too thin. The backup dancers are from HKT48 I think.

77. Overtake (Koko ni Ita Koto): I think this song has atrocious lyrics (like work harder unpopular girls, because that’s why you’re unpopular, you’re lazy lol) but it’s the Team A song of the album so I guess people wanted it in…

76. Koi wo Kataru Shijin ni Narenakute (S3) (AX11 96): With all the great group songs in S3 this is the one that ranks? I’m baffled. Especially because it actually went up from where it ranked last year

Encore:

DIVA - Lost the Way: World premier of their new single, including new members (that hopefully will remain backdancers or I’ll have to kick Akimoto).

Iwasa Misaki - Mujin Eki: Enka princess of AKB sings her beautiful and incredibly sad debut song.

AKB48 - Flying Get: I don’t get this one lol They should’ve done BINGO or something that wouldn’t rank IMO, but this is the song the new fans know so I guess it makes sense. Poor Wasamin having to dance to this in a kimono xD

Expect the rest of the list later this evening or tomorrow because I have to study now xD See you then!

I don’t want to get flamed out of the AKb forums so here goes nothing:

I hate the fact that everything that has to do with Acchan has to be so extreme in this fandom :/ It’s like you either hate her guts or love her blindly and are ready to jump on the throat of anyone who says even the smallest negative thing about her.

I think it’s frustrating me especially with this whole Kouhaku live singing business. I’m sure that if she had lip synched everyone would be giving her a hard time for it, and she sang live (and admittedly, pretty bad, but it’s not like she can’t perform properly!) and it’s still an issue. Idk, it makes me tired. Especially because I like her in a random kind of way so I can’t join either camp :/

Hi everyone. This is really hard for me to put into coherent words, so please bear with me if I get a bit rambly.

First of all, sorry for not updating in so long, my real life has been hectic, and I’ve had to study like crazy for the past month because I have to pass a really difficult exam so I don’t have a lot of free time.

However, that’s not the real reason why I haven’t updated in so long but rather the fact that I’ve been kind of upset with AKB lately :/

You see, I became a fan of AKB because I loved their music. Sure, I know it’s nothing particularly artsy or meaningful or whatever, but it was music that I could relate to, that cheered me up when I felt down and that I genuinely enjoyed listening to. However, things have changed a lot in the past 2 years, and right now AKB is a completely different beast from what it was when I started liking them.

I feel that the management or whoever is in charge of the group (I’m inclined to say Akimoto lol) doesn’t care about the music anymore, and I understand the reasons behind that:

1. The mainstream audience that is following AKB now likes them because a particular brand of bubbly harmless pop songs so they can’t alienate them by making them sing something else

2. CMs and TV shows are big sources of income, so of course the girls will be busy with those things, and the songs used for tie-ins have to be mainstream friendly as well

3. New stages are completely impossible at the time, not only Akimoto has way too much on his plate, but also the girls have a million different jobs to do because of their agency and the AKB related jobs on top of all of that so they have no time to learn 16 songs and dances.

4. To be honest, idols are not supposed to be about the music in the first place.

Even though I understand all of this, I speak from my personal experience with idols, and for me that experience is mainly based on their music. I enjoy the TV shows as much as the next person, but to be honest I barely have any free time, and I’m not going to spend it all keeping up with the TV shows which can be a little bit of a hit-or-miss thing. Also, my japanese isn’t perfect, I can understand about 70% of what’s said in those shows, but sometimes it’s too much of a hassle to strain my ears so much and rack my brain to get what they are saying.

The predictable single schedule doesn’t do anything for me, I hate it. Again, I understand the reasons behind it, and if there’s anyone who loves seasonal songs that’s the japanese for sure, so it obviously makes a lot of sense to have the sakura ballad - summer bubbly song - upbeat election song - cool autumn song and now apparently the janken single with a throwaway A-side. It makes sense, but I hate it.

I miss the times when I was super excited to find out what the next single would be about, when I would look forward to who would be chosen as senbatsu for the next single, what would the outfits look like, the dance etc. Right now it’s more like “Oh, it’s time for the Sakura ballad, I bet they wear a school uniform and have a dance with lame hand moves *snore*”

I don’t want to rain on anyone’s parade you know, I really respect the new fans and I understand that there are a lot of ways to enjoy the idols you like, and all of that is valid. But this is a blog, and it’s supposed to be about my opinions, and if they are negative opinions I’m torn, you know? I don’t want to be the party pooper, especially when so many new fans are getting into AKB for what they are now.

I don’t like overly negative fandoms, which is part of what I dislike about my Perfume and Kalafina fandoms to be honest. If I hear someone else complaining about why Perfume isn’t doing something completely groundbreaking and instead doing safe commercial stuff I think I’ll cry. Same with Kalafina, if I hear someone else dissing Hikaru and saying that Keiko should be the only one who sings anything in the group I’m probably going to bang my head against a wall, but it’s hypocritical of me to judge people on their honest opinions and they’re completely entitled to express them.

It’s weird because I find myself thinking “Why can’t they just enjoy Perfume/Kalafina for what they are instead of complaining all the time for things that can’t be changed?” but that’s exactly what I can’t do about AKB right now, and it’s conflicting.

I’ve always tried to keep this blog positive and fun, because when I first started it it was supposed to be for the new fans, and I wasn’t going to turn them down with a lot of negative stuff. I’m really sarcastic, snarky and negative in real life, and I was glad that I had a place where I could just be positive and happy and outgoing even if only for a while xD

But back then I was really excited and happy about everything that AKB did, I wasn’t ever faking anything! I was just so glad that I was following this amazing group of hard working young girls who were not afraid to be themselves and derp around and performed amazingly on stage all the time. My, my how things have changed! I don’t even know if this blog is good enough for new fans because I’m not into SKE and NMB enough so as to include them in my blogging, I don’t watch any TV shows regularly, I don’t even know who the kks are anymore because I have no time to watch their LODs and I basically don’t care about the direction AKB has taken now that they are popular. So what am I supposed to do?

I can’t fool myself anymore. The truth is that the last A-side I was personally fond of was Everyday, Katyusha, and my level of cared has plummeted so much that I haven’t even watched the PV for Ue Kara Mariko, and I honestly don’t care about that. When I heard the song preview I just wanted to laugh and hit myself at the same time, it sounds SO DAMN GENERIC. It sounds exactly like every Under Girls song of this year, and I’m sick of that. So I thought “I’m going to blog about Kaze ga Fuiteiru” but what was I going to say? That even though I loved the title track and the PV and the double center I hated everything else about it? That Gondola Lift was boring, Vamos was the most annoying song ever and the UG song was so generic that I didn’t even bother listeining to it more than once?

I could’ve done that, and it would’ve been honest, but I don’t want to rain on anyone’s parade, I don’t want to be the downer. AKB has been giving me hope and happiness for so long that I don’t want to let them go even if I pretty much dislike everything about their new concept.

So that’s why I haven’t blogged. Because I didn’t want to rip apart “KazeFui”, because I didn’t want to snore at “Ue Kara Mariko”, I didn’t want to rage at the stupid disgusting “AKBaby” thing. But then I didn’t know what to say, because I don’t want to be fake either, it’s very conflicting.

I had been thinking about giving up the fandom for good, because what’s the point in sticking around for something that frustrates you more than it makes you happy? But then yesterday I decided to watch the Team K “AKB ga Ippai” concert, and when they were singing the old single medley I remembered everything, why I liked them, why I supported them, why their music means so much to me.

I can’t leave the AKB fandom, because by now it has become an extremely important part of my life. I got ready for my first dates with my boyfriend listening to “Koi no Plan” I said goodbye to one of my best friends with “Aozora no soba ni ite”, I fell in love for the first time in my life with “Don’t Disturb”, I felt sad that I couldn’t be a bigger part of his life and listened to “Bird”, I figured out that I wasn’t getting my feelings across with “Iiwake Maybe”, I managed to stand up again and keep moving forward even though I was hopeless with “RIVER”. There’s just so much of me in their music, I can’t let go of that part of my life, and it sounds stupid because it’s just idol music but to me it means something else, and I’m not going to give up on them.

Sure, they don’t need me as a fan, because they have millions of people following them and they are probably richer than me and better at supporting them, but I want to stick by my girls and keep pushing their backs regardless. I guess that there’s still hope for me xD Team KII got a new fantastic stage, NMB are getting great songs for their singles, maybe AKB is next? I don’t promise to update daily or anything like that, but I do promise to be honest, and try to keep it real even if it’s not the most positive opinion in the world. It doesn’t matter that I’m disappointed with their music now if they can still wow me and make great songs that I like, and as long as that happens I think I’ll stick around

Hi everyone! Thsi week has been complete madness IRL for me, so I apologize for the lack of updates!

AKB48 has released their latest single “Kaze ga Fuiteiru” breaking their own record previously set with Flying Get for highest first day sales for a single ever since they started getting counted by Oricon. Congratulations to the girls! I have to say that KazeFui is definitely my favorite AKB A-side this year, it’s an incredibly beautiful song with a sad but encouraging meaning so give it a try.

I also loved the PV, although I might be in the minority for that xD Oh well, I’ve always been one for unpopular opinions anyway.

Let’s continue with the 30 day idol challenge!

Day 16 - Favorite Idol from a group not named before

I know that choosing a *48 group for this question is probably cheating a bit, but I love Nana so much that I can’t help it xD To be honest, I don’t have time to follow NMB very much (if at all) but ever since I watched the auditions I loved this girl. I didn’t know her from SINA because I didn’t even know what that group was lol but when I saw her in Starhime I knew that she would be my favorite because I’m initially super shallow with idols until I know them more.

So yeah, Nana is incredibly pretty, in ways that I can’t even understand. I love her lips and her big eyes and her innocent overall look even though she has a really hot body, it’s an interesting combination xd

I wanted to watch a performance with her to decide whether she was going to be the one or not, and then I watched the N1 stage and I was blown away by her. She’s a fantastic performer and even though her voice is pretty funny (quite high pitched but husky at the same time)  she works with it fantastically and it completes her image somehow gahh I don’t even know what I’m saying, she’s perfect I guess?