I don’t want to get flamed out of the AKb forums so here goes nothing:

I hate the fact that everything that has to do with Acchan has to be so extreme in this fandom :/ It’s like you either hate her guts or love her blindly and are ready to jump on the throat of anyone who says even the smallest negative thing about her.

I think it’s frustrating me especially with this whole Kouhaku live singing business. I’m sure that if she had lip synched everyone would be giving her a hard time for it, and she sang live (and admittedly, pretty bad, but it’s not like she can’t perform properly!) and it’s still an issue. Idk, it makes me tired. Especially because I like her in a random kind of way so I can’t join either camp :/

Hi everyone. This is really hard for me to put into coherent words, so please bear with me if I get a bit rambly.

First of all, sorry for not updating in so long, my real life has been hectic, and I’ve had to study like crazy for the past month because I have to pass a really difficult exam so I don’t have a lot of free time.

However, that’s not the real reason why I haven’t updated in so long but rather the fact that I’ve been kind of upset with AKB lately :/

You see, I became a fan of AKB because I loved their music. Sure, I know it’s nothing particularly artsy or meaningful or whatever, but it was music that I could relate to, that cheered me up when I felt down and that I genuinely enjoyed listening to. However, things have changed a lot in the past 2 years, and right now AKB is a completely different beast from what it was when I started liking them.

I feel that the management or whoever is in charge of the group (I’m inclined to say Akimoto lol) doesn’t care about the music anymore, and I understand the reasons behind that:

1. The mainstream audience that is following AKB now likes them because a particular brand of bubbly harmless pop songs so they can’t alienate them by making them sing something else

2. CMs and TV shows are big sources of income, so of course the girls will be busy with those things, and the songs used for tie-ins have to be mainstream friendly as well

3. New stages are completely impossible at the time, not only Akimoto has way too much on his plate, but also the girls have a million different jobs to do because of their agency and the AKB related jobs on top of all of that so they have no time to learn 16 songs and dances.

4. To be honest, idols are not supposed to be about the music in the first place.

Even though I understand all of this, I speak from my personal experience with idols, and for me that experience is mainly based on their music. I enjoy the TV shows as much as the next person, but to be honest I barely have any free time, and I’m not going to spend it all keeping up with the TV shows which can be a little bit of a hit-or-miss thing. Also, my japanese isn’t perfect, I can understand about 70% of what’s said in those shows, but sometimes it’s too much of a hassle to strain my ears so much and rack my brain to get what they are saying.

The predictable single schedule doesn’t do anything for me, I hate it. Again, I understand the reasons behind it, and if there’s anyone who loves seasonal songs that’s the japanese for sure, so it obviously makes a lot of sense to have the sakura ballad - summer bubbly song - upbeat election song - cool autumn song and now apparently the janken single with a throwaway A-side. It makes sense, but I hate it.

I miss the times when I was super excited to find out what the next single would be about, when I would look forward to who would be chosen as senbatsu for the next single, what would the outfits look like, the dance etc. Right now it’s more like “Oh, it’s time for the Sakura ballad, I bet they wear a school uniform and have a dance with lame hand moves *snore*”

I don’t want to rain on anyone’s parade you know, I really respect the new fans and I understand that there are a lot of ways to enjoy the idols you like, and all of that is valid. But this is a blog, and it’s supposed to be about my opinions, and if they are negative opinions I’m torn, you know? I don’t want to be the party pooper, especially when so many new fans are getting into AKB for what they are now.

I don’t like overly negative fandoms, which is part of what I dislike about my Perfume and Kalafina fandoms to be honest. If I hear someone else complaining about why Perfume isn’t doing something completely groundbreaking and instead doing safe commercial stuff I think I’ll cry. Same with Kalafina, if I hear someone else dissing Hikaru and saying that Keiko should be the only one who sings anything in the group I’m probably going to bang my head against a wall, but it’s hypocritical of me to judge people on their honest opinions and they’re completely entitled to express them.

It’s weird because I find myself thinking “Why can’t they just enjoy Perfume/Kalafina for what they are instead of complaining all the time for things that can’t be changed?” but that’s exactly what I can’t do about AKB right now, and it’s conflicting.

I’ve always tried to keep this blog positive and fun, because when I first started it it was supposed to be for the new fans, and I wasn’t going to turn them down with a lot of negative stuff. I’m really sarcastic, snarky and negative in real life, and I was glad that I had a place where I could just be positive and happy and outgoing even if only for a while xD

But back then I was really excited and happy about everything that AKB did, I wasn’t ever faking anything! I was just so glad that I was following this amazing group of hard working young girls who were not afraid to be themselves and derp around and performed amazingly on stage all the time. My, my how things have changed! I don’t even know if this blog is good enough for new fans because I’m not into SKE and NMB enough so as to include them in my blogging, I don’t watch any TV shows regularly, I don’t even know who the kks are anymore because I have no time to watch their LODs and I basically don’t care about the direction AKB has taken now that they are popular. So what am I supposed to do?

I can’t fool myself anymore. The truth is that the last A-side I was personally fond of was Everyday, Katyusha, and my level of cared has plummeted so much that I haven’t even watched the PV for Ue Kara Mariko, and I honestly don’t care about that. When I heard the song preview I just wanted to laugh and hit myself at the same time, it sounds SO DAMN GENERIC. It sounds exactly like every Under Girls song of this year, and I’m sick of that. So I thought “I’m going to blog about Kaze ga Fuiteiru” but what was I going to say? That even though I loved the title track and the PV and the double center I hated everything else about it? That Gondola Lift was boring, Vamos was the most annoying song ever and the UG song was so generic that I didn’t even bother listeining to it more than once?

I could’ve done that, and it would’ve been honest, but I don’t want to rain on anyone’s parade, I don’t want to be the downer. AKB has been giving me hope and happiness for so long that I don’t want to let them go even if I pretty much dislike everything about their new concept.

So that’s why I haven’t blogged. Because I didn’t want to rip apart “KazeFui”, because I didn’t want to snore at “Ue Kara Mariko”, I didn’t want to rage at the stupid disgusting “AKBaby” thing. But then I didn’t know what to say, because I don’t want to be fake either, it’s very conflicting.

I had been thinking about giving up the fandom for good, because what’s the point in sticking around for something that frustrates you more than it makes you happy? But then yesterday I decided to watch the Team K “AKB ga Ippai” concert, and when they were singing the old single medley I remembered everything, why I liked them, why I supported them, why their music means so much to me.

I can’t leave the AKB fandom, because by now it has become an extremely important part of my life. I got ready for my first dates with my boyfriend listening to “Koi no Plan” I said goodbye to one of my best friends with “Aozora no soba ni ite”, I fell in love for the first time in my life with “Don’t Disturb”, I felt sad that I couldn’t be a bigger part of his life and listened to “Bird”, I figured out that I wasn’t getting my feelings across with “Iiwake Maybe”, I managed to stand up again and keep moving forward even though I was hopeless with “RIVER”. There’s just so much of me in their music, I can’t let go of that part of my life, and it sounds stupid because it’s just idol music but to me it means something else, and I’m not going to give up on them.

Sure, they don’t need me as a fan, because they have millions of people following them and they are probably richer than me and better at supporting them, but I want to stick by my girls and keep pushing their backs regardless. I guess that there’s still hope for me xD Team KII got a new fantastic stage, NMB are getting great songs for their singles, maybe AKB is next? I don’t promise to update daily or anything like that, but I do promise to be honest, and try to keep it real even if it’s not the most positive opinion in the world. It doesn’t matter that I’m disappointed with their music now if they can still wow me and make great songs that I like, and as long as that happens I think I’ll stick around

Hi everyone! Thsi week has been complete madness IRL for me, so I apologize for the lack of updates!

AKB48 has released their latest single “Kaze ga Fuiteiru” breaking their own record previously set with Flying Get for highest first day sales for a single ever since they started getting counted by Oricon. Congratulations to the girls! I have to say that KazeFui is definitely my favorite AKB A-side this year, it’s an incredibly beautiful song with a sad but encouraging meaning so give it a try.

I also loved the PV, although I might be in the minority for that xD Oh well, I’ve always been one for unpopular opinions anyway.

Let’s continue with the 30 day idol challenge!

Day 16 - Favorite Idol from a group not named before

I know that choosing a *48 group for this question is probably cheating a bit, but I love Nana so much that I can’t help it xD To be honest, I don’t have time to follow NMB very much (if at all) but ever since I watched the auditions I loved this girl. I didn’t know her from SINA because I didn’t even know what that group was lol but when I saw her in Starhime I knew that she would be my favorite because I’m initially super shallow with idols until I know them more.

So yeah, Nana is incredibly pretty, in ways that I can’t even understand. I love her lips and her big eyes and her innocent overall look even though she has a really hot body, it’s an interesting combination xd

I wanted to watch a performance with her to decide whether she was going to be the one or not, and then I watched the N1 stage and I was blown away by her. She’s a fantastic performer and even though her voice is pretty funny (quite high pitched but husky at the same time)  she works with it fantastically and it completes her image somehow gahh I don’t even know what I’m saying, she’s perfect I guess?

Hi people! Today I’ll continue with the challenge, we’re already halfway through with it! Yay!

Day 15 - Favorite Momoiro Clover member

Ahhh MomoClo, I remember when they were completely indie and people talked about them like a gem about to be discovered.

The thing is that while I acknowledge that MomoClo is a fantastic group and they definitely have their own flavor to set them apart from the others, I feel like this flavor doesn’t go with me xD They remind me a bit of SKE with their hugely energetic performances but these girls take it up a notch by having hilarious PVs to go along with them and super fun sounding songs, pretty much everything MomoClo related I’ve heard sounds a bit like the wacky Team B Oshi (But I haven’t heard much, so don’t count on my opinion too much).

The problem is that I’m getting a little old for that to be honest. Sometimes I wonder if I haven’t gotten too old for idols all together. I know that there isn’t an age bracket that allows you to enjoy idols, but I just can’t relate to songs about lunch boxes and stuff like that (and my time in school was completely meh and it was a million years ago, so I don’t have particularly fond memories of that either).

That doesn’t have a lot to do with the question at hand though xD So yeah, since MomoClo are a bit too youthful to fit my tastes I’ve never really gotten into the group. The cutest one for me is the pink girl, but the one that always catches my attention is the leader

Kanako impresses me because she’s super energetic but also looks like she’s really in charge of the situation even when she’s goofing off with the other girls. How vanilla of me to pick the center girl, but really, if I ever drop my stupid age notions and stop feeling like “I’m a grown up now I need to listen to serious music only” MomoClo is first on the list of things to really pay attention to

Maybe then I’ll get back to you and say whether the pink girl really became my favorite or not.

I just read the single most upsetting piece of news I’ve read since 2008 and I don’t know how to process it or word it, but it’s still a really big deal so I figured I’d blog about it. I’m probably going to swear like a sailor, so you’ve been warned.

SDN48 or Saturday Night 48 was an idol group created by Akimoto Yasushi 2 years ago, his intentions were to create a group for girls over 18 years old and initially intended for their audience to be over 18 years old as well.

Then he proceeded to transfer some of AKB’s older members to it. Noro Kayo, Ohori Megumi, Sato Yukari and Urano Kazumi were moved to it and graduated from AKB48 with the team shuffle.

SDN48 isn’t a porn show like some people think. The girls that are part of the group are on average really talented girls, and their songs have a more mature feel to them (some of them are sexy songs, but not all) with the girls pulling off spectacular performances.

Despite all this, what I found the best feature about them was the fact that they completely threw out of the window the ridiculous premise the whole idol business is based upon: Youth is your most valuable asset. These girls were amazing young ladies of a varied group of ages, and they weren’t bound by the stupid rules of no boyfriends, no drinking blah blah blah, this made their MCs really entertaining and enhanced their connection to their fans, because they felt a whole lot more real than a bunch of teens in a school uniform bouncing around and squeaking in high pitched voices while pretending that they’ve never been in love.

After SDN started releasing singles, I was super excited, because I really love them and I wish I could get into them, but with the lack of SDN LODs it’s definitely complicated for me :s Without counting that they haven’t released their stage on DVD either. Their singles were sexy and sassy while a little underwhelming based on their predictable choice to make popular girls center even though they weren’t the most talented, which made them sound different from the fuller and deeper sound of their stage songs, but hey, being this far along in the fandom, I already am aware that stage songs will always be better yet remain underappreciated.

After this ridiculously long intro, here comes the bomb.

SDN48’s captain, Noro Kayo announced in a recent show that all of the members of SDN48 have decided “together” to graduate next year. They will have a graduation concert on 12/03/31.

Here’s a link to the announcement in Ebi48

Whoa. I haven’t been this upset ever since the Elder Club massacre in H!P, or the mass Team A graduation from which I haven’t recovered yet (I’ll probably never be able to like Team A again after that).

What is the fucking point of creating a group that’s going to be shafted like hell (they only have one stage) in order to give it the axe in 2 years?

What is the fucking point in having auditions and forming a 3rd gen if they were planning on pulling the plug on this? And don’t give me that “we all decided together” shit. How can the 3rd gen girls decide to graduate? They’ve barely been in the group as is ffs!

I understand that SDN’s singles don’t sell as well as the other xxx48 singles, but come on. Akimoto is a smart guy, he must’ve known that japanese people are obsessed with youth and cuteness so SDN wouldn’t ever sell millions. They didn’t do that badly either, they outsold every non48 idol group with every release.

It just makes no fucking sense. I know that idols are a business not a happy fluffy family full of feelings and emotions, but this is just being a dick.

It’s still not clear whether this means disbandment or not, the girls haven’t blogged about it and there aren’t any official words either; however, from the wording of the whole thing it looks like it’s bye bye for the best 48 group. They were the ones who were talented, sassy, unafraid to show themselves just like they are, we will never have that in any of the other 48 groups and it pisses me off.

I’m getting old for idols, the reason why I stick with AKB it’s because there are still girls who are older than me in there xD That’s also the reason why I can’t get into SKE, I just don’t care about high school stuff anymore (funnily enough, I did care when I was in college because medshool is like high school here, no kidding) and I was hoping that with the addition of one of my all time favorite AKB members in Tojima Hana I would finally find the chance to get on board with SDN, I was really rooting for her to do well and become a front girl and now that’s just all gone.

I’m very very pissed at Akimoto or whoever decided this (it wasn’t “everyone” come on, it’s never “everyone”) because from the moment SDN was formed I was so excited that there was at least one human being thinking forward in the idol industry. Now I see that that’s all bullshit.

Don’t get me wrong, I still really care about AKB, and there are times when I’m just feeling silly and want to have fun so I’ll listen and dance along to Yasai Sisters, but I can’t help becoming a little jaded after so many years in the fandom. I understand what being an idol is about, but it gets a little tiresome to listen to 23 year olds saying that the last time they liked a boy was in kindergarden and pretending to blush whenever someone makes a comment related to sex. I’m equally tired of fanboys raging that their girls aren’t virgins anymore because of a stupid purikura (Get real. Most of them are definitely not virgins, why should they be?)

I guess I have Dream Morning Musume to console me. If I’m lucky enough, Koharu will graduate and I’ll finally have another idol group I can really follow without rolling my eyes every time I hear a stupid fucking bouncy under girls song with 19 year old girls pretending to be 5 and winking spastically /bitter.

EDIT: Newsflash. It’s all in Ebi48, so check the link I posted earlier, but it looks like the group is actually disbanding, the girls have blogged about it. And there’s a statement from a staff member now too: Basically, he’s saying that since the girls got SO MUCH promotion (pfffft yeah right) they became lazy and took everything for granted, so he decided to graduate all of them so that they would work harder for their dreams.

Right. That makes a lot of sense. Because SDN was the most pampered group of the 48 family, obviously. And they were so from day one, getting a million promotion deals and Tv shows from their debut. Oh no, wait, I was talking about NMB! Sorry, my bad, I can’t even remember SDN BECAUSE THEY WERE GIVEN FUCKING SQUAT.

And besides, that “work harder” excuse is even worse than “she must continue her studies” Work harder at what exactly if you’re leaving them out of jobs?

FUCK YOU. Just… I can’t even.

I’m just going to ask everyone who cares about SDN or the girls that were part of it (I’m guilty of knowing only the ex-AKB girls, but I adore them) to please buy the Kaze wa Fuiteiru single of AKB48 and vote in the next Request Hour for the song Kodoku na Runner from SDN. It’s all I can do, and I don’t even have money to buy more than 2 copies, but I don’t want the girls to leave feeling unwanted and shafted like they were just an afterthought in Akimoto’s mind that didn’t go as well as he planned. I know that casual fans or new fans probably don’t care and they’re going to vote for all of AKB’s King Records singles A-sides and B-sides, so we’ll need as much help as we can get, that’s why I’m posting this here.