Bikkuri Project

The costume Hall of Shame theme for today (if you didn’t read the title is…)

When Fabric Attacks!!!

Yes, fabric attacks have been on the rise in Hello Project. It starts with the idea “hey! We can have them wear one costume over another skimpier costume, and then they can change really quickly mid-show!” It’s a good idea in theory, but sometimes the costume designers seem to get so excited about the sexy 2^nd costume that they forget that the idol is going to have to appear onstage in the first one. They start whipping around the layers of fabric, and soon the singer is more cocooned and bloated-looking than a silk worm. Let’s look at Goto Maki, who I’m beginning to suspect decided to leave h!p solely because of the wardrobe choices in her latest concert tour.

I realize that she’s going for a “period” look, but good lord. There’s more fabric on her right now than I have on my entire bed (and my bedroom is really cold!). The impression I’m getting is less “regal French courtesan” and more “regal French jellyfish”.

Oh come on! Were they even trying to make this look like an outfit and not a large blanket that’s been awkwardly bunched up and pinned onto Maki? Wait. I see what really happened here. Granny Goto has seen the shockingly indecent clothes her granddaughter has been wearing in photos lately, and so she set out to crochet the largest and bulkiest shroud she could in order to protect Maki’s modesty. I can say with confidence that her modesty is well protected here. Pull the hood down a bit, and that could be Tsunku under there and you wouldn’t know the difference!

Well, that’s all for this time. Sorry I’ve been picking on Maki so much, but I really think that these outfits deserve it. Now that you’ve seen what excess fabric can do if unchecked, please remember that if you see any fabric behaving suspiciously, do not panic! Contact the proper authorities and…

Aaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!! Watch out Ai-chan!!! There’s something climbing up your shoulder and I think it’s heading for your face!!!!