Bikkuri Project

Here’s some Cute to cheer you up! It cheered me up anyway. Notice that the solo lines are sung live, and they ALL sound good, and it’s the last song of the concert, so they’re bound to be tired. C-ute may be the most consistant h!p group overall when it comes to lives. Also, man I love Chisato’s voice.

Is this the beginning of the h!p clip of the week? I’ll think about it. I don’t want to be a copy-cat, but that sounds fun.

I am attempting to institute a poll feature in this blog. I know it’s a dangerous endeavor because a poll that no one votes in is a failed poll. I’m quite scared of failure, but I’m going to push through that to put up this poll. If you don’t vote in it I might be afraid to ever try anything again, so I’ll probably spend the rest of my life hiding under my bed. If you don’t want that on your conscience, you should vote.

We all know that there are some strange h!p promotional videos out there, and with this poll I’m trying to determine which one is the very weirdest. I’ve taken the liberty of selecting 8 PVs that score highly on the bizarrity scale (measured in wtf’s? per minute). I’ve included links to the videos in case you aren’t familiar as well as short commentary about why I picked them. These aren’t PVs that I hate, just some that I find…unusual. I’m excluding Minimoni PVs because they’re aimed specifically at kids, and stuff aimed at kids is always kind of special. In no particular order…

Miki Fujimoto- Romantic Ukare Mode http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9GscUXNsVMg&feature=related
Miki emerges from some kind of cryogenic chamber and proceeds to play with magical rhythmic gymnastic equipment, sparkly grass, and a golf flag. Includes lots of creepy shots of her in the pod thing staring at you.

Morning Musume- The Peace http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-8zX21IDtm0
You’re probably familiar with this PV, but have you ever really thought about it? It’s a bunch of girls dancing around and cleaning a men’s restroom (presumably on a ship), emerging from toilet stalls, and, in the grade finale, the toilets start emitting light and the entire restroom turns into a disco paradise.

(Sort of)Melon Kinenbi- Onegai Miwaku no Target Mango Pudding Mix http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DJYSivO9pEs&feature=related
I don’t know if this actually counts as a Melon Kinenbi PV because they’re not in it, but I guess their voices are. Four black men lip sync to a Melon Kinenbi song. It seemed like a terrible joke…but it wasn’t.

KiraPika- Hana wo Puun http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3DpHJ5VQDSg
Koharu and Mai come out of a giant nose at the beginning of the PV, and then it goes to hang behind them, dripping snot. I think that whoever made the PV had some kind of nose fetish, because they’re everywhere.

Abe Natsumi- Koi no telephone goal http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L5Ircnsw1qY
Mild mannered Nacchi by day, evil purple creature fighting master of disguise by night. At one point she uses her magical ring to turn into a stereotypical Mexican, complete with giant sombrero, maracas, and a mustache.

Aya Matsuura- Doki Doki love mail http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rrZ1Pf_ktNA
There are too many weird and seemingly unrelated scenes here for me to talk about, so just a few of the stranger ones: giant Ayaya frolicking through a city like Godzilla, Ayaya’s magical remote control that causes Tokyo Tower to blast off into space like a rocket, and robot Ayaya who has a shiny red bulb for a nose and does homework.

W- Aa ii na http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RBldNjaopEE
The weird/creepiest part of this PV is the monstrous koi thing that keeps popping up. I also like the part where they calmly march through an apartment where some family is having dinner.

Maki Goto- Uwasa no sexy guy http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qS_F7oF_I9o
The video seems pretty standard/futuristic at first. It’s not a goofy song, so why should I expect a goofy video? Sure, the scene with her flying around in the devil costume is weird, but…. Wait! Is Maki holding a baby pig? Why yes, yes she is, and it’s doing the background vocals.

What are you waiting for?? Get voting!

http://www.veoh.com/videos/v1460155RxrEXCte

I know I already updated today, but I found this video, and I just had to share it. It’s of a performance on a TV show from MM’s recent Taiwan visit. It’s a medley of Love Machine, RR21, and The Peace (all the classics). If you ignore the shitty shitty camera-work (why are there shots of someone’s feet and shots that are almost upsidedown?) it’s a great performance. Oh, and there are some previews of everyone that’s going to be on the show at the beginning, but morning musume is the first performance, so just skip to 2:15 or so. Some thoughts.

1st-I think that Risa is the one doing “the face” at the beginning of Love Machine, so that answers that question.
2nd-Really camera people. I’m sure they have nice shoes and all, but how about a shot of the girls who are actually singing?
3rd- Awwww. Panda’s first Love Machine.
4th- LinLin is totally spazzing in the background during koha’s “peace” monolog.She’s so funny!
5th- OMG Aika, stop being so adorable, or you’re going to kill me. I’m seriously becoming obsessed with her lately. Just watch her during the whoa whoa peacepeace parts. First the picture of her with the puppy and now this? <3 <3 <3 Here are my latest Aika observations
-Has she lost weight? I don’t remember her being that tiny.
-They’re pairing her with Koharu a lot lately, aren’t they? It makes sense, since they’re the youngest and essentially alone in their generations, but I’m not sure I like their voices together as much as some other combos.
-Wow, she’s sure grabbing Sayu’s ass for a long time there during the “chou chou chou ii kanji” part of RR

It’s the Morning Musume Moment Awards! Today a distinguished panel of judges (me) will be picking the ________est Morning Musume Moments. Links are included where appropriate.

Cutest Morning Musume Moment

Tanaka Reina with some kittens http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pv9OdyeSNXY

All together, ready? Awwwwwww!In a cuteness competition, kittens are a trump card. The fact that this clip contains not only kittens, but also Reina, makes it the automatic winner of this one.

Angriest Morning Musume Moment

Fujimoto Miki’s Resignation

I’ve never liked Mikitty that much. I always regarded her as kind of a necessary evil due to her excellent singing voice, but her “I don’t give a shit about any of this” attitude has always pissed me off. She got caught with her boyfriend. All right. That was careless of her, but the pictures were blurry, and the agency was willing to cover for her. What does Miki do? She goes ahead and announces, “Yep, it’s me. I’m not sorry and I’m not being in Morning Musume anymore.” So she wanted to leave Morning Musume. Fine. I have no problem with that, but there’s a right way and a wrong way to go about leaving Morning Musume, and she chose the absolute wrongest way she could have. Did she even think about how this would affect Ai-chan (being forced into a position she wasn’t ready for), the rest of her group (losing one of their main singers and having to deal with a scandal), her agency (looks like they have no control over their artists and yet another scandal), her fans (felt betrayed), or anybody else who had to apologize for her because she wouldn’t? NO!!! All she thought about was herself and what she wanted. Conclusion: Miki Fujimoto is a selfish bitch. *is glad to get that ranting out of the way*

Funniest Morning Musume Moment

Niigaki Risa and the two buildings. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DnuqYsfuGBk

Let me start off by saying that this one was HARD to pick. There are just so many to choose from. Runner up is Kago Ai’s many desperate and panic stricken attempts to come up with a four kanji idiom under threat of inflating balloon, ultimately resulting in her spitting out her own name (can’t find a link. If you have one, i’d appreciate it). I picked this moment, though, because it’s just so unintentionally hilarious. Risa’s just blissfully babbling on about her buildings, and she doesn’t seem to understand why everyone thinks it’s so funny. Even Mikitty is in tears at how funny it is. She just keeps going and going. Start at the good building and then go to the second building for octopus and then back to the good building for shoping and then back to the second building for a movie and then to the amusement park between the two buildings to ride the bullet ferris wheel….Oh Risa…I heart you.

Most Surprising Morning Musume Moment

The announcement of the new Chinese members

I’ve written a bit about this before, butthat really is the time that h!p has thrown me for the biggest loop. I come back from vacation and load up a page and “WHAT??? New mm members? But they weren’t even having auditions! WHAT?? They’re Chinese!”. Something like that. I was never opposed to the idea of Chinese members, just slightly wary and very very surprised. I’ve come to love JunLin, so it all turned out for the best, but man H!P, if you’re going to add new Morning Musume members, at least give us some warning next time, k?

Saddest Morning Musume Moment

5^th gen’s Suki na Sempai performance at Konkon and Makoto’s Graduation Concert http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B5wWfL2gBM4
My favorite (and most tear prone) generation singing their song together for the last time, with not one, but two of their own leaving them forever, and they’re just sobbing the whole time, and it always gets to me when girls are crying and singing, but you know that these four share a really special bond so it’s even sadder, and they seem like they can barely get through it without totally breaking down,and they sound terrible, but they’re still trying to smile through their tears, and…and…and… waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!

Happiest Morning Musume Moment

The entire “Ai araba it’s all right” PV http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xfh8Xyowy0E

When I’m in a bad mood, I watch this PV and it cheers me up every time without fail. MM is at its cutest and most cheerful in this PV. All my favorite members are there and looking radiant with happiness, and they’re all telling me “Hey! It’s all right!” How could I not believe them?

A real emotional roller coaster, right? Aren’t you glad I ended on ‘happy’? Hopefully you’ll all be left in a good mood now.

Bikkuri Project: Spreading Happiness Throughout the Internet, one Wota at a Time