For the Aucifer fans

Posted on February 25th, 2010 15:33 by Henkka
Categories: Site news
Tags: ,

Just a quick announcement. From here on out, all Aucifer-related posts are going to be made at another blog. This way the Aucifer fans* will be happy, and those of you who couldn’t give less of a shit will be even happier. Whoo-hoo! Everyone wins!

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* = there are no Aucifer fans left in the world.


Tsunku’s .GIFt to you + SNSD metalhead?

Posted on February 4th, 2010 20:39 by Henkka
Categories: .gifs, Eyecandy, Polls
Tags: , , , ,

These images right here will be the best thing I ever post on this blog:

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What has been seen can not be unseen. But then I don’t wish to ever unsee that.

If you look on the right, you’ll see there is a new poll. You need to vote in it. Which one of the Girls’ Generation members is most likely to be a fan of true Norwegian black metal? Who secretly owns the whole discography from Burzum or watches video interviews of Gaahl explaining that Satan is the main ideology behind his music? Which one is it?! I’m sure there’s got to be one! Is it Seohyun? Could it be Taeyeon? Oh no… is it Yoona?!

When I started thinking about it, my first guess was Sunny. Actually, I was dead set on her. It’s just the name: Sunny. Don’t you feel like she’s hiding something? Sunny — a cute teen popper at day, metalhead at night! She’s like Dexter. It’s a perfect disguise. But then, I saw this scan from the booklet of “Oh!” and now I’m convinced. There’s no doubt in my mind. Tiffany gets my vote. I doubt anyone is fooled by the bible quotation. It’s too obvious — no one quotes the bible these days. Oh Tiffany… it’s not right! It’s not yet too late! There’s still time to change your blasphemous ways!

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123tiffany

Now for some past polls.

konomunepoll
bearpoll

Alright. In hindsight, Kono Mune no Tokimeki wasn’t that amazing. It was solid, but not solid enough to make you “forget about the concept of numbers and scales.” No, the majority of you feel that it was only good enough to have a pillow fight with Mano over — and even that is probably not so much the song as it is just your fetish for pillows talking.

As for the second one, the victor is pretty clear here. In a cage match between Shimizu and a bear, the bear would win. Just, the more girly of the two bears. It’s not even really a competition. I mean, do you even realize how tall she is? God she’s so sexy…

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However, it’s possible that even Her Bearness wouldn’t defeat Saki without resorting to heavy measures. It’s good to remember that when fighting Saki, one might run into an… obstacle of sorts.

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O, Sakimilk


Girls’ Generation - Oh!

Posted on February 4th, 2010 5:50 by Henkka
Categories: Album reviews, K-pop, Reviews
Tags:

scan193Release date: 2010/01/28
Tracklist
:

1. Oh!
2. Show! Show! Show!
3. &Fun (Sweet Talking Baby)
4. 영원히 너와 꿈꾸고 싶다 (Forever)
5. 웃자 (Be Happy)
6. 화성인 바이러스 (Boys & Girls) (feat. key of SHINee)
7. 카라멜 커피 (Talk To Me)
8. 별별별 (☆★☆)
9. 무조건 해피엔딩 (Stick Wit U)
10. 좋은 일만 생각하기 (Day by Day)
11. Gee
12. 소원을 말해봐 (Genie)

The music event most fans have looked forward to the most for a good half a year now? Most definitely.

Like many, I first learned about SNSD back at the time of the Gee syndrome. I heard it just days after the MV was online before the actual CD was released and I have to admit: I was immediately caught in the Gee fever. Fast forward to the follow-up song Genie which worked only to make me appreciate them better, and since then it’s just been an excruciating wait until their sophomore album. Now that it’s finally here and I’ve given the album the attentive listen or ten it deserves before a review? Do good things come to those who wait?

Well… hell, I’d be a liar if I called it an awful album.

genie

I wasn’t a fan of their debut album. While it had a couple of memorable tunes, they were drowned out by tracks I can consider little more than pointless filler. The Gee mini-album continued exactly in that same vein (save for the title track), but with the Genie album they got things halfway right: while it admittedly had its points that made me yawn, I can still play it through without cringing.

However, with Oh! they have considerably upped the ante due to the greatly improved songwriting and a huge increase in variety. That is, while the album of course comprises of your usual K-pop mix of electronic pop and the couple of ballads, they’ve managed to keep it fresh: I can’t really say any song here reminds me of the other. For example, whereas the title track sets the stage with hyper, silly bubblegum pop, Show! Show! Show! shifts gears with a very cool rocking, technopop-influenced beat — which is not a favorite style of mine to be sure, but I’ll let it fly. Talk To Me, the very neat jazzy piece with a sweet accompanying piano and contrabass, might be the exception here. It might sound out of place, but like I always say: cute girls and the sweet, sweet sounds of contrabass make for one happy Henkka. Alright, I’ve never said that before in my life, but you know.

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Out of the album tracks here, my favorite has to be 뻔&Fun (Sweet Talking Baby). I know, I know, I’m a sucker for the cute, girly ones. I can’t help it. While it opens with a bit of that Boccherino minuet (Op. 11, No. 5), it quickly transitions into a complete cuteness assault, sounding like a continuation of Kissing You from the debut and Etude off Genie. Some fans have dubbed this style as the “aegyo sound” — I can go with that! It’s just another name for “disgustingly cute bubbly pop.”

When I first got this album, I set my sights on two tracks in particular: 웃자 (Be Happy) and 별별별 (☆★☆). After some investigation, I found that the guy responsible for these tracks was none other than E-TRIBE, the man behind Gee. Really, with each successive song this guy comes out with, he’s closing in on Tsunku-level awesomeness in my books. Just, E-TRIBE releases around 100 songs less per year… but Tsunku is Tsunku. Useless to talk about mortals and Tsunku in the same sentence.

No, but just as you might expect from one such guy, he doesn’t disappoint. The former track is for sure one of the strong points here. Crazily infectious catchy K-pop, literally telling you to smile and be happy, I dig it. However, it was the latter track that worried me. My first listen, a couple of seconds in and I could already tell: “Uh-oh… *gulp* a ballad…” See, I don’t have an issue with ballads, but I do have an issue with hopeless and soulless K-pop ballads that seem to fill up a nice portion of every single last release out there. SNSD themselves have not escaped this fate with past releases either. However, believe it or not, even the ballads of this album — 별별별 (☆★☆) & 영원히 너와 꿈꾸고 싶다 (Forever) — don’t leave you wanting to slit your wrists just so you don’t have to finish listening to them. This is K-pop we’re talking about here: I consider that in itself a miracle!

But when you talk about E-TRIBE, there’s also of course that song…

girls-generation

It’s probably not an exaggeration to say Gee is one of the catchiest and most memorable songs of the past decade. I’m going to say that while it’s first and foremost the Wonder Girls making the K-pop sound heard in the US and beyond, in Korea, rather than the Nobodies and Tell Mes, Gee was a country-wide phenomenon. Surely enough, some of that immense success was bound to attract fans even from outside of Korea. That still continues to this day, actually. It’s not that the Wonder Girls or the other big K-pop acts were ever exactly an underground thing, but I remember those first few months of 2009 when seemingly everyone was getting sucked into the Gee craze and becoming drawn into the K-pop scene. The after-effects of that tune can still be seen now. Hell, and you thought it was just a couple of cute girls innocently going “Gee gee gee gee, baby baby baby!

You know, when I started thinking about this entry, I figured there’s no way this album would walk away with a score higher than a three. But really, what reason would I have to not award it something better? While I can’t call it perfect as not all of the tracks are to my complete liking, there’s no unlistenable songs to be found here. Every single track here can hook you. Without doubt, Oh! is the best K-pop album that’s graced my ears thus far. Listen to it, would you?

Rating: 4 out of 5
Recommended tracks: Gee, 소원을 말해봐 (Genie), 뻔&Fun (Sweet Talking Baby)


On a quick note: Ayaya owns you

Posted on February 1st, 2010 14:35 by Henkka
Categories: H!P & TNX, Hype
Tags:

The bonus DVD of Ayaya’s Naked Songs album. Ayaya in studio doing a great ten numbers backed by a live band. What more could you ask for? Personal favorites include the fantastic cover of “Don’t Know Why“, her rocking first single “Dokki Doki! LOVE Mail” and first and foremost, the absolutely awesome “I Know.” Really, it’s essential viewing for any Ayaya fan out there.


And you know, let’s face it. While I can’t claim to know any better than you… I have to say, Ayaya has to be the best performer to ever come out of H!P. She is ridiculously awesome. There’s no un-cheesy way of saying this, but she has the voice of a goddess and she was born to do music. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not one of those people to say H!P went to shit after the Elder Club graduated. I’m still very much into H!P and I do try to buy anything worth buying, but they lost something irreplaceable with Aya. This DVD will demonstrate that to you. She rocks the hell out of these songs even in studio, and she doesn’t break a sweat while doing so.

It’s arguably the best bonus DVD in the history of H!P releases and while I obviously won’t hold it against you if you download it, I also urge you to buy the album. It should still be available in some online stores or at the very least eBay.

Hell, you’d probably just spend your money on beer anyway. Give that money to Ayaya and with any luck, it’s her who will buy beer with your money. And as you know, Japanese people don’t hold their booze too well — with any luck, the next big scandal is the paparazzi catching a drunken Ayaya running around Tokyo, shouting inane shit about Tsunku being a son of a bitch and taking off all her clothes. I’m a huge Ayaya fan so it’s not that I want her to get in trouble or anything, but I’ll be honest with you guys: I do want to see her naked.

Now that’s an idea for the bonus DVD of Naked Songs II. Would make the title more fitting. I feel like making a joke involving Aya’s undoubtedly impressive breasts, but I’d better not fuck with things infinitely more meaningful and significant than me.

Although I would, if given the chance. Oh, damnit! Couldn’t help myself.

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FAKSM: Nile - Kafir!

Posted on January 31st, 2010 14:23 by Henkka
Categories: Fucking Amazing Kickass Song of the Moment
Tags:

FAKSM stands for Fucking Amazing Kickass Song of the Moment.

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I  have never seen anything as sickening as that hideous… beast.
Hell, I wonder if that thing’s even legal.
That’s not a guitar,
that’s a weapon of mass destruction.

Kafir!

There is no God but God
There is no God but God
There is no God but the one true God
There is no God but the hidden God
There is no God
Allah Akbar!

In the name of the unmerciful, the unbenevolent
In the name of the lord of the worlds
Owner of the day of judgment
Show us the path of those who earn anger
And those who go astray

As for the disbelievers
Whether thou warn them, or warn them not
Is all one for them
They believe not
And theirs is an awful doom

Kafir!

O mankind
Worship the God whom thou hast created
Who hast created thee
And those who came before thee
O mankind
Thou sons of Simian ancestors
Guard yourself against the fire
Prepared for disbelievers
Whose fuel is of men and stones

There is no God but God
There is no God but God
There is no God but the one true God
There is no God but the hidden God
There is no God

Nile. I wouldn’t call them an awful band.